My wife is a most knowing woman

 

    (capo 1st)           D - G - D - A - D - A - A7 - D

 

            D

1. My wife is a most knowing woman,

                           G                D

    she always is finding me out,

 

    she never will hear explanations

           E                              A

    but instantly puts me to rout.

                 A7                             D

    There's no use to try and deceive her,

        E                                          A

    if out with my friends night or day,

             A7                            D

    in a most inconceivable manner,

            A                       A7               D

    she tells where I've been right away.

 

    She says that I'm "mean" and "inhuman."

                  A            A7                   D       

    Oh! My wife is a most knowing woman.

 

    - A - D - E - A        A7 - D - A - A7 - D

 

               D

2. She would've been hung up for witchcraft,

                               G              D

    if she had lived sooner, I know,

 

    there's no hiding anything from her,

              E                                   A

    she knows what I do, where I go.

           A7                         D

    And if I come in after midnight,

            E                                   A

    and say "I have been to the lodge,"

                  A7                                  D

    oh, she says while she flies in a fury,

                A                  A7               D

    "Now don't think to play such a dodge!

 

 

 

 

 

 

    It's all very fine, but won't do, man !”

                   A           A7                   D

    Oh, my wife is a most knowing woman.

 

    - A - D - E - A       A7 - D - A - A7 - D

 

            D

3. Not often I go out to dinner,

                                  G           D

    and come home a little "so so,"

 

    I try to creep up through the hall-way,

           E                                  A

    as still as a mouse, on tip-toe.

               A7                             D

    She's sure to be waiting up for me,

              E                                    A

    and then comes a nice little scene,

                       A7                                       D

    "What, you tell me you're sober, you wretch you,

              A                   A7             D

    now don't think that I am so green!

 

    My life is quite worn out with you, man!"

                  A             A7                  D

    Oh, my wife is a most knowing woman!

 

    - A - D - E - A        A7 - D - A - A7 - D

 

               D

4. She knows me much better than I do,

                                  G            D

    her eyes are like those of a lynx,

 

    though how she discovers my secrets,

           E                                     A

    is a riddle would puzzle a sphinx.

          A7                                        D

    On fair days, when we go out walking,

        E                              A

    if ladies look at me askance,

                A7                                  D

    in the most harmless way, I assure you,

           A                     A7               D

    my wife gives me, oh! such a glance.

 

 

 

 

 

 

    And says "all these insults you'll rue, man !"

                  A             A7                  D

    Oh, my wife is a most knowing woman.

 

    - A - D - E - A       A7 - D - A - A7 - D

 

                 D

5. Yes, I must give all of my friends up,

                           G                D

    if I would live happy and quiet,

 

    one might as well be 'neath a tombstone,

         E                                 A

    as live in confusion and riot.

            A7                               D

    This life we all know is a short one,

               E                                                  A

    while some tongues are long, heaven knows,

                A7                        D

    and a miserable life is a husband's,

              A                  A7               D

    who numbers his wife with his foes.

 

    I'll stay at home now like a true man,

                  A            A7                  D

    oh, my wife is a most knowing woman.

 

     - A - D - E - A       A7 - D - A - A7 - D

 

    (Stephen C. Foster)